In Life and in Death

I got a call from my hubby this morning. He said that MIL had a better night. They started to give her Morphine to help her relax so she could breath better. My sweet hubby spent the night at the hospital so that if anything were to happen he would be there. They are talking about next week being a time she might go home. They said things could change either way.

My husband said that last night she started going over her final wishes with him. He said it really threw him for a loop. But in the end he felt better about everything. She took a lot of guess work out of it. Speculation is not a comforting way to deal with situations like this.

I was reading about the death or really life of Corey Haim. All the comments end up leading back to abuse of his addictions. He was a actor but his addiction defined everyones opinion of him. That seems to be all anyone wants to talk about.

So I started thinking. When I die will people just define my as the "Alcoholic?" Will they say, "well I saw that coming!" "No surprise there." All those things people thought about Corey.

My heart aches for addicts. Some have better control while still others don't. I feel heartache for the homeless guy on the street. I feel heartache for the attorney in the 5k suit. I feel for anyone who can't get their addictions under control. Sometimes it's a battle to a early grave.

I hope I am remembered as a mother who loved her family. Not a alcoholic.

I guess it will all depend on how I die.